EVERY LITTLE THING YOU DO IS MAGIC

I realise that I haven’t written for a while so if you are a regular reader thanks for sticking around.

It has been a busy year for me and a year that seems to have gone by very quickly.  Perhaps it is true that the time seems to go quicker the older you get.  I have certainly been busy getting older as I had my 60^th Birthday last year.  I have also been busy with the Grandparent Support Group SNUG (special needs united Grandparents) which I am very pleased to say has grown in numbers and is still growing.  SNUG is, I feel, more than just a support group, it is a platform where information can be shared and passed on and new skills learnt.  Information is a powerful tool.

Although I write a lot about Jessica, she is one of three children that I am proud to call my Granddaughters.  Jessica has an older Sister (Natalie) who has just turned 9 and she also has a Cousin (Beth) who was 1 in November.  I love them to bits, they are all individuals with their own  (often funny) little ways and personalities. 

The Summer brought on many changes.  Jessica & her family moved to a bigger house which was more suited to the growing needs of both Jessica and her Sister. There is a ground floor play room and large private garden which both Jessica and Natalie love.  There is room for a trampoline for Natalie (and Jess under supervision) and swings and slide for both children.  Jessica loves the garden and will go out and just walk round and round touching the trees and often pulling off a leaf and just looking at it in her hand but her most treasured item is her swing.  Children with sensory processing disorder like Jess get a lot of much needed stimulation out of swinging.

At Christmas (seems a distant memory now) we all got together as a family as per usual and it was lovely to see Jess and her Cousin Beth sharing toys.  Jess is getting better at interacting with others, although she still prefers to do her own thing most of the time, but at one point she was sitting with Beth on the floor and both were sharing the same toy and seemed to be enjoying themselves.

Jessica also said goodbye to her SN nursery in the Summer and now goes to ‘big’ school.  This school also caters specifically for children with disabilities and she should be able to stay there until she is about 19 which is good news as this means that she will not have to keep being moved  (something that children like Jess do not always cope well with).

It was a sad day for both Jessica and I when she left Nursery.  Jessica had always been happy there and they understood her needs very well and I had been lucky enough to be able to become involved as a volunteer and then working as a dinner lady.  I have made  friends there and have also learnt such a lot from both staff and pupils. 

We wondered how she would get on at her new school, especially having had the long Summer Break in between, but again I think we have struck gold as Jessica was made very welcome by everyone and she took to it straight away.

Now lets bring this right up to date.  Did you make a New Years Resolution this time?

I once read an article about New Year’s Resolutions and how people can become quite depressed half way through the New Year once they realise that they have not kept to the resolution they had set out to do.  The article suggested that people should make a note of all their achievements during the year to offset that feeling of failure.  I decided to do this myself at the beginning of last year and my achievement jar was created.  I also decided that I would do the same for Jessica as a way of remembering all of the little things that she would no doubt achieve but can get forgotten in the scheme of things.

Today I opened my jar and that of Jessicas (a day late I know) and I would like to share with you Jessica’s achievements.  No dates are recorded as they are unimportant so they are not in any particular order just the order I pulled them out:-

Puts hand to chest to signify ‘me’ and knows when to do this.

Progressed so well at her new school that she is being moved out of the sensory group and into a classroom after Christmas.

Started at new school and loves it.

Uses switches to ask for more and for a drink.

Can get up and down steps on her own either standing or sitting.

Loved her new schools nativity – she was a King and coped very well with the noise etc and her costume (including crown). Lots of smiles all the way through.

Sat on big swing and held on whilst being gently pushed (Jess now has a specially adapted swing which means she can be pushed for longer & faster more safely making it more enjoyable)

Had a banana for tea and when her Daddy came home & asked her what she had eaten she grabbed my hand pressed the banana picture on Grid Player.

Showing an understanding of what is being said to her.  Asked her if she wanted to go on her swing and she went to the door and tried to open it.

Getting more control over noises she is making (varying the pitch and the volume)

Has had quite a few wees when sitting on the potty

Holds spoon and puts food into her mouth

Goes up stairs (crawling) in new house.

Starting to form word sounds like “hello” and “hiya”.  Said hello when she got out of the taxi.

Jessica got an achievement certificate from her school.

Able to climb up the big slide on her own unaided and come down the slide safely

Walked up stairs in the old house upright holding onto the handrail

These are just things that I have observed but I daresay that her parents and her other Grandparents could add more. 

All those who are involved in one way or another with children will know that each child develops at his/her own pace, but in the case of the special needs child this can often seem a slow process and there are often quite long periods when it seems nothing has happened much developmental wise which can cause families to feel disheartened, especially if siblings or other family member’s are reaching their milestones at what seems to be a rapid rate.  One rule I learnt very quickly upon joining the Greenhall Nursery family was that each child should be looked at in terms of what they can do rather than what they cannot and that every achievement should be celebrated no matter how small it might. All too often families are given a list of all the things that their child will probably never do upon learning that their baby has been born with a disability. I know that this was very much the case with Jessica.

One of the things that we were told early on with regards to Jessica was that because of her developmental delay she would only be able to learn so much and then one day it will all come to a stop, the window of opportunity will be closed and then that would be it, Jess would remain at whatever level she had reached.  It could not be predicted when this ‘window’ would close.  This analogy was always at the back of my mind and each time there were periods when Jessica did not seem to have developed much then I would be thinking that this was it, the ‘window’ had been shut.  Thankfully this has not proven to be the case and to be honest I now regard this as a load of old rubbish as I do with various other things we were told. 

Creating an achievement jar has helped to keep me positive with regards to Jessica’s continuing progress. 

“what about your achievement jar” I hear you ask.  Well I am not going to share it but I am rather pleased with some of the things I achieved during 2015 and there is no shame in feeling good about yourself.  I ended 2015 on a positive note and look forward to a very positive year ahead.

Why not give it a go.  All you will need is a jar/tin/box anything really to store your bits of paper in.  Decorate it if you feel the need.  Then put it somewhere prominent so you remember to add to it and next to it put some paper or post it notes and a pen.  Remember to jot down anything that has made you feel good about yourself, no matter how small.  These are YOUR personal feel goods, nothing to do with anyone else (unless you share them).  Or why not keep one for your child or encourage your child to do it for themselves.  We should all be made to feel good about ourselves and be proud of our achievements no matter how big or small.

Climbing the big slide

Yay I did it

HIGHER NANNY

I LOVE MY SWING

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE