LETTING GO

Hello again, thank you for joining me, it’s been a while:-

I wrote a post about change not so long ago, well now for some more.   Some good and some not so good.  All in some way contributing to me not really having much thought for writing at the time, but here I am again so let me start at the beginning, which according to Maria in the Sound of Music “is a very good place to start”!

The first change to the normal family routine was definitely a very good one.  It was the birth of my third Granddaughter Beth.  My youngest Daughter Sarah and her Husband Paul’s first child and a cousin for Natalie and Jess.  Beth arrived safely into the world on the 8th November, a very timely arrival as it is a Birthday she now shares with my Hubby, her Granddad Rob.  With Natalie and Jess growing up it is nice to hold a baby again, although she is also growing up fast and will not remain a baby for long.  Jess was curious when Beth arrived and got very excited when Beth cried!  She seems naturally very gentle with her which is lovely.  Natalie of course was over the moon at being able to hold a baby again and gives her lots of fuss.

The next change was one I bought on myself after much soul searching.  I recently decided to leave my dinner time job. I have been working as a dinner lady at Jess’s SN Nursery since August last year.  I have been doing voluntary work there since Jess started full time, mainly helping in the hydro pool, so when the chance of a paid job came up I applied straight away and was lucky enough to get one of the two positions on offer.  I worked just two hours per day 12.00-2.00, setting up for the group which I was assigned to, helping the children in that group to eat their lunch and clearing away afterwards.  It was hard work at times, but I have loved every minute.  So why leave?  

The main reason I suppose was that Rob took early retirement end of last year (more change) and I wanted to be able to free up some of my time so that we can have days together if we want to.   

I left just as we broke up for Easter and I was overwhelmed by the cards and gifts that I received from both Staff and children.  We were all getting together after lunch to say goodbye to one another as we were finishing early and I was called out of the circle and the children were told that I was leaving as a Dinner Lady and I was handed flowers and gifts.  That made me tearful enough but then a child from each group was brought forward with a card that their group had made for me and I had a huge lump in my throat and found it very difficult to say anything.  Later in the car on the way home I sobbed for most of the journey and then again when I got home and looked more closely at what I had been given and what had been written inside the cards.  I have said I would still help out in the hydro pool when needed until July so I am not severing all ties just yet but I shall miss the banter I used to have with the children and those that I worked with.

The next changes on the horizon are going to be the hardest for me.  Jess will be leaving her nursery end July and will be starting at a new SN School in September.  It will not be practical for me to take her as I do some days at the moment, as the school is in the opposite direction so she will be going on special transport with escorts.  Although on the days that her Mum is at work I shall still  be waiting at her home to receive her in the afternoon, I can’t help but feel a certain amount of sadness and trepidation. 

It is important that Jess does this.  She has to learn to adapt to change, she has to learn to be able to adapt to new situations and new people and I am sure that she will settle very well.  I, on the other hand am finding it very hard to even think about it at the moment.  I gave up my job in Estate Agency 3.1/2 years ago  when jess was just over a year old, so that I could help with her care.  It’s hard to believe that she could not even sit up unaided then and look at her now.  She runs, climbs and generally does not stop.  We have been through a lot together Jess and I.  It’s been a tough journey at times both physically and mentally but it’s been one of the most rewarding times of my life.  Of course I shall still be helping out with both Jess and Natalie especially in the school holidays, it’s not as if everything is suddenly coming to an end, but it does feel like the end of an era. 


To quote yet another song  LET IT GO……